Looking out for one another

If you haven’t heard from a friend in a while, or you notice they’ve been a little distant or upset, it might be a nice gesture to pass by and check in on how they’re doing. Sometimes just knowing that someone is there for you can make all the difference.

As a community, both at UCL and beyond, it’s important that we look out for one another, and there are lots of ways you can do this:

1. Keep an eye out

It can be difficult to spot when someone is struggling, but a good friend will always keep an eye out for changes in behaviour. If you do spot something different in the way your friend is acting, you may want to ask them if things are okay, or direct them to professional support.

2. Send a message

A simple text, instant message or email to ask how a friend is doing can really make a difference. The message is a sign that there are people who care for them and may lead them to express how they’re feeling.

3. Pick up the phone

Calling isn’t always the easiest thing, but it allows you to connect with others in real time. The human voice is also soothing, so hearing a familiar voice may bring a real sense of comfort to the person you’re reaching out to. If you’re unable to get hold of them for a call, you could always follow up with a voice note.

4. Write a letter or note

Doing something a little old school can often be the best of ways. Handwritten letters and notes could bring a smile to your friend’s face. You don’t have to write much, just a couple of lines asking them how they are and if there’s anything you can do to help. You could even pop their favourite chocolate bar into the envelope too!

5. Make time

Student life can often be very busy and it may be hard to catch up with friends as often as you’d like. If you are reaching out to a friend, ensure that you make time to talk to them and hear them out fully – you wouldn’t want to rush the conversation. You could allocate time in your schedule to do this, so that you and your friend both know you’ll be free.

6. Seek to understand

It’s important to understand that we don’t all experience situations in the same way. Something you may have found easy may be very difficult for a friend. Hear them out, try to understand their point of view and explore options with them.

7. Do things together

After all, this is what friends do best. You could offer to help them with understanding a certain piece of university work, cook some food and sent it round to them, play games together online or offer to do their online shopping for them. Small acts of kindness can help to lift the burden from others, but be sure to not overstretch yourself.